One of the things about being a recovering perfectionist and people pleaser is I have a really hard time being happy or excited when someone else gets something good.
True confessions.
But when I hear someone got a new writing gig or promotion or everyone loves their tweets or they’re the teacher’s pet or they were acknowledged for something I do (maybe I even do it better)…I struggle.
I know it’s wrong. I know it’s sin. I know it’s not good.
And I’m working on it.
It’s just that when I hear or experience these things there seems to be a people-pleasing-perfectionist trigger that goes off and quickly begins sending thoughts of doubt, insecurity, and jealousy to my brain.
Am I not good enough?
I guess they don’t like me as much? Do I not put myself out there enough? Am I not being “real” enough?
Why did she get that and not me? Why didn’t they reply to my comment? Was it not good enough?
It just goes to show that as far as I’ve come out from under the grip of perfection I still have a ways to go.
I’m just a sinner being continually saved by grace.
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I’m sorry, did you say your name is Jessica? Because I’m pretty sure you are talking about me…
I really don’t appreciate you telling people about my issues…Oh wait…
For real girl, I have The. Same. Issues!!! I read this and thought, “now how did she know? I’ve never told anyone!”
So very thankful for Grace, knowing I don’t deserve at At. All. makes it that much sweeter. So, I’ll pray for you and you can pray for me. {man, I gotta make sure my prayers are better than hers!} lol J/K!
Aww…so I’m not the only one! Yeah! That makes me feel better…and not as crazy!
I was going to ask if we were sisters!?! I see that the other two commenters can relate as well. You are definitely not crazy!